Do you believe in soul mates?
Some people believe there is a soul mate for everyone; others do not believe soul mates exist. Some say “soul mate” is the same as the one true love of your life, while others think there are too many scientific factors separating the possibilities for truth in soul mate theories.
Is there a secret to finding the perfect one?
Some believe soul mates are simply two people in love who are equally compatible in values while others believe it’s a religion based theory and our fate, and soul mate, is predetermined.
Some believe there are multiple soul mates for everyone, allowing increased odds to be with at least one of your soul mates in a lifetime. Others say your soul mate is a mystery and remains as such until you meet and then you’ll “just know” because everything is easy, with the exception of the occasional communication bump.
Others say it’s a matter of science and when you feel you “can’t live without” someone, you have found your true love and soul mate. (The scary part about this theory, however, is how many times has this been said by those who thought they were in love and it turned out to be short-lived?)
The point is, the theories are endless; and conclusions are elusive.
Some may wonder why they haven’t yet met their soul mate; others may feel they’ve been looking for a long time without success.
Is there a secret to meeting and finding not only that perfect one, but that perfect soul mate?
Meeting someone (i.e. your soulmate) requires a little more than just wanting to meet someone. It requires a balance in your life that is inviting to others. It requires opening your mind, soul, heart—when everything aligns. (And no, it has nothing to do with the alignment of the ‘stars’.) Letting go of old baggage (negativity, “ex” issues, etc.) is crucial to getting yourself ready to meet someone. If you’re closed off in any way, negative in any way—it’s going to show, even when you think you can mask it behind false smiles.
For your soul mate to notice you (often times your soulmate is already in your life), you’re going to want them to see the real “you” shining through, even on a bad day or through a “blond” moment.
If someone is approachable, this shows through in their personality. Often times people feel they can hide their feelings fairly well to the outside world, when in fact, it shows in facial expressions and body language (from a fake smile, to wrinkles in the forehead, to the way a person crosses their arms, to how they stand, etc.); but when a person is happy inside, it shows on their face and in everything they do.
The next thing is being content, secure and happy with yourself, which translates into being able to accept and like yourself (all you are, stand for and believe in), and being able to spend time alone without feeling alone. It also means accepting that you don’t need someone else to “complete” you or make you happy.
There’s no tried and true test to know where you fall in being secure without the assistance of a professional however a quick test to find out whether you’re ready would be to ask yourself about your past relationships…if you find you are still bitter, you may have some issues to work through. However, if you find that you respond with feelings that the relationship(s) simply didn’t work due to incompatibility or bad timing, then you’re probably ready to move on and meet someone new.
Harboring feelings is never good for the soul; but finding the lesson and being able to grow is the least one can hope to gain from the past. Again, this is just one simple test. Therapy is always an option for deeper issues or a life check. Everyone is unique and should try what’s best for them.
The most important thing is having interests and goals; and being content with who you are inside—not to be confused with the outside. Although it’s true that when we feel good about how we look on the outside, it can carry inward, so of course people always want to look their best (appropriate outfit, hair combed or styled, adding a little bling and a smile) before venturing out. Besides, you never know who you’re going to run into during your day.
Equally important is taking time for yourself. When was the last time you spent an evening alone?
Being secure with yourself is an open window to others that tells them it’s safe to approach. If you are unable to accept yourself and be content, how is anyone else going to?
Discovering the secrets to “your” internal balance will shine through to the rest of the world in a positive light.
It may sound like a lot of work however it’s really quite simple—it’s about taking that first step (awareness). And it’s not about reaching a finish line—it’s about the “work in progress”—because that’s what life is, and therein lies the reality, and the fun.
Once you’ve reached this road to contentment, and once you feel the happiness (balance), you’ll know you’re ready to meet someone else who will only add to (enhance) your already interesting and wonderful life.
And when you least expect it, that soul mate you’ve been wondering about just may come walking around the next corner…
“If grass can grow through cement, love can find you at every time in your life.” -Cher
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