Our inner dialogue is something we devote little time to examining, yet it is a subject worth delving into. It’s a fact that most people are a bit in the dark about how they speak to themselves. You might question the notion of speaking to yourself. But if you think about it, you are talking to yourself each waking hour of the day. As a matter of fact, no one talks to you as much as you talk to yourself, not even close. Our minds rest little during our waking hours, and we are ever the critics of ourselves, no matter what we would otherwise like to believe.
So take this test: pay attention for one day to your inner voice. Notice what you say to yourself all day long. And if that’s more time than you have to devote, do it for one hour. Chances are you will find yourself a bit shocked at how many negative things you find yourself saying.
“I look fat in this outfit.” “God, I’m looking old.” “What an idiot I am, I should have done … “ “My boss just looked at me funny. He must be thinking … “ “She doesn’t like me, I can tell by the look on her face.”
Sound at all familiar? Chances are you can fill in a myriad of your own comments without even hesitating.
What people fail to understand is that they are truly listening to the banter taking place inside. Think for a minute if someone else was talking to you the way you talk to yourself. “Gee, honey, you do look fat in that outfit.” Or “God, you must be stupid.” It’s doubtful that you would enjoy or even put up with that type of treatment. Yet it’s okay coming from you? That’s a curious thing, isn’t it?
And if that doesn’t hit home, then in your mind’s eye, try switching who your dialoge is directed at. Instead of talking to yourself negatively, picture saying the same things you say to yourself, to your best friend, your husband or your child. Would you really consider talking to your loved ones in such a manner? It’s very doubtful. And that begs the question, why we don’t afford ourselves the same courtesy we give to others?
Follow this simple recommendation for change, to venture down the path of becoming your own best friend. Once you’ve actually realized your inner dialogue for what it is, try adding one positive thought for every negative. If you achieve that goal, then add two. There’s no limit to how many positives you can add for each negative thought you detect.
And what hopefully you will discover as you practice this exercise is that there’s also no limit to how wonderful you might find that you truly are.