Here in Los Angeles, we have it good. Where else does a place exist that is 75 degrees and sunny every day, a decent living can be made as a Dog Walker or jewelery peddler on Venice boardwalk, and find yourself either nestled in the mountains a few short hours away or catching a wave in the Pacific? It’s almost too good to be true. Rest assured -it is. If you are single and living in this town, it’s of no surprise to me that you are more than likely experiencing some difficulty finding what some may call a “soul mate” -if you believe in such a thing.
Over the last decade or so, I’ve spent more than my fair share of time on the dating circuit. Dating is neither fun like they portray it to be on Sex and the City, nor is it empowering. What it is, is depressing. I thank my lucky stars every day that a few years ago, I fell in love and married my now Husband. Needless to say, I don’t spend my free time partying anymore, claiming to having a blast with my other single girlfriends but secretly hoping that maybe, just maybe I’ll meet Mr. Right. That being said, married or not, I still make it a point to grab a cocktail now and then with my girlfriends at the hot spot of the moment and by doing so, I have realized something. Even though I met a wonderful man, a lot of women in LA, have not.
In LA, there are three types of women. 1. Married. 2. Forty and never been married. 3. Divorced and looking again.
***Please let it be noted here that there is a fourth category of women I like to refer to as “In their 20’s and having all the sex the rest of us aren’t”. These young women don’t count. They’re having far too much d*%k to care about falling in love just yet.***
For most married women (myself included) it is easy to forget what it’s like to be single and dating -always on the lookout for love. Married women are infuriating. We are the ones whining to our other married girlfriends while sharing cigarettes, “This is just so hard. I never realized how irritating he is! I wish I could be single again for just one day.” We are guilty of something I like to call, “The grass is always greener…” syndrome. Hear what I’m saying, Ladies. Appreciate your Husband because there are millions of younger, hotter and more eager to please in bed women, out there who will.
Single women in their 40’s are very complex. Most are terrified of being alone and many feel incapable of being loved. Researchers from Vanderbilt University show in their new study that as women get older, they have fewer sexual partners as a result of cultural beliefs and social effects of aging. These single women may be much more set in their ways than a woman in her thirties. By this age, you have probably had some significant relationships spanning over many years. Because none of these relationships ended in a proposal it may feel like these were failures not successes. It’s important to remember gals -lasting love does exist even though it has alluded you thus far. But first answer me this question. “Do you really want to be in love or just think that you do?”
Now, if you are divorced and hoping to finding love again, beware the unavailable man! It is a most deadly trap -one that many of us have fallen prey to. But be honest. Have you really wanted to fall in love again when you’ve just split your assets 50/50 (if you’re lucky) with the first man you vowed to be with forever? My guess is, you’re a little gun shy. Pay attention, divorcees. If you are not willing to change the type of men you pick, the type of man you will get is one who doesn’t want you.
So after some careful examination, I had a thought…If the Divorcees are busy wishing that they never got married in the first place just so they won’t be referred to as “the one who was left” one more time, and the Old Maid’s are hoping Prince Charming isn’t just a damn Fairy Tale and the married Broads are making plea bargains with God to return to them the freedom they are so envious of their single friends for…Well, I got to thinking. Are there any women in LA who are happy with what they have?